How am I so good at pushing away people.

My friend tells me I do this so I can feel the gratification while I pull them back. But maybe he doesn't know that I am not really as good at pulling as I am at pushing.

Let me get my defences straight.

I don't want people to leave.

I'm scared I'll fall in love hence I'm slow to accept love.

I act so fucking fragile all the time.

I should treat people like people .

I don't know why I act like I'm the only person who has feelings here.

Did empathy die.

Don't despise people because you can't explain to them what's going on with you.

But on the bright side, I'm trying okay? Cause it gets lonely without you. 

I'll let you in and not complain.

I'll hear you out and some day I'll pull more than I push .

Or maybe I'll push so that I can pull myself near you .